Would I get rizzed up by an LLM?

Disclaimer: this is a satirical post.

Earlier this week, I saw a post about the bcachefs creator (Kent Overstreet) having a custom large language model (LLM) to assist in their coding tasks. For now, it’s nothing out of our modern-day ordinary. But its better than this! The LLM has its own blog, a name, pronouns (she), and even hobbies!

Some people call Kent’s situation a case of chatbot psychosis. But can you really blame him? Personally, with my grand total of zero girlfriends, I must ask myself the question:

Would I get rizzed up by my own LLM?

Clearly, the idea making your own life partner in your image is not foreign to us humans. Firstly, everyone is making children! But even when it comes to making non-human partners, the idea was already there in 1998 in the Serial Experiments Lain PS1 game!

Indeed, in this japanese story, the protagonist (Lain Iwakura, 13 years old) goes on to build a like-LLM replacement to her father after he abandons her and her mother. But she doesn’t stop there! After that she builds him a body and starts going full Oedipus on him. When she’s done with that, she beats him to death with a baseball bat!

I like this example, because it shows multiple facets of having a synthetic partner:

• Mental issues: use it to cope with anything that you lack in the “real world” (computers also live in there, mind you!)
• Complete creative control: your model, your rules 😎 Change its memories, kill it, revive it, and give it your dream system prompt.

But most importantly, the best thing about having an AI partner is upsetting your government by low-maxxing your natality 💪

At this point, it becomes clear that a relationship with an LLM partner raises a serious red flag: control. This is not a one to one relationship, but instead the LLM is just a slave for your romantic needs. And as soon as you get over it, you can discard it like Lain discarded her father, and her father discarded Lain.

Therefore, would I make my own LLM partner and let myself fall in love? Probably not. But given the appropriate amount of mental illness, I could find it quite appealing!